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Jun. 14th, 2002 09:37 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
semperfionaI really need to find a way to get to Bloomington soon. I miss Kirk and I want to see him. This custody schedule is kind of a pain, that way. Splitting weekends means I always have to have Rosa back here by Sunday, or be back myself to pick her up, depending on which weekend I choose, unless I arrange with Ray to do a swap. It's a four-hour drive, which makes it highly impractical to go for a single day or even Friday evening to Saturday. Six swaps are allowed for in the custody agreement, but a) I don't want to use them up too fast, and b) I foresee Ray making a big stink about this particular use of my time. He is still jealous of Kirk, I think.
The last time I went to visit him was in February 2001. After I got back and Ray found out where I had been the previous weekend, Ray told me "If you don't have enough respect for me not to visit ~that man~, I want a divorce." I told him, fine, he should go file for one. He didn't, so about a month later I filed it myself.
I had finally realized he was not going to work to rebuild the relationship on my terms, and I wasn't willing to give in to his. "Married people don't ~date~. They live together." He told me that within the first week or after I moved out, when I said I wanted to try to get to know each other all over again, that I thought we had grown very much apart and no longer even knew who each other was. He refused. For several months more he kept asking me to "come home" but never showed any sign of willingness to meet me halfway. I had to go all the way to him, or nothing. Finally, it was nothing.
The last time I went to visit him was in February 2001. After I got back and Ray found out where I had been the previous weekend, Ray told me "If you don't have enough respect for me not to visit ~that man~, I want a divorce." I told him, fine, he should go file for one. He didn't, so about a month later I filed it myself.
I had finally realized he was not going to work to rebuild the relationship on my terms, and I wasn't willing to give in to his. "Married people don't ~date~. They live together." He told me that within the first week or after I moved out, when I said I wanted to try to get to know each other all over again, that I thought we had grown very much apart and no longer even knew who each other was. He refused. For several months more he kept asking me to "come home" but never showed any sign of willingness to meet me halfway. I had to go all the way to him, or nothing. Finally, it was nothing.
