Email

[semperfiona]

I read an article in the "USA Today" this morning (it lives in the company lunchroom, or I'd never read it) which claimed that email can destroy relationships, due to people's misinterpretations, and gave several anecdotal examples.

I find that my experience is exactly the opposite. Email builds relationships. But then, I live in a world of text, so perhaps I'm different from the subjects of the article. Still, it was correct in at least one regard: I do know that I need to get out of the text world and connect via telephone and in-person as well.

The more avenues of connection I can have with someone, the better. Email, chat, telephone, face-to-face...it all adds up to relationship-building and time spent together.

But email can be wonderful and happy-making: there's nothing quite like the pleasure of seeing a beloved name in the inbox (unless it be finding a paper letter in my mailbox--which is another order of pleasure altogether), and the thought that can go into it means that for me it is often a good venue for difficult conversations, as well.

Comments

[krasota.livejournal.com]

i tease boy by telling him he was an internet.lover... ;) when i met him, he was painfully shy and didn't talk much. he was also morose over being separated from his high school love. i promised to show him how to use email (this was his second night at college, my seventh, but i'd been using the net for a couple years by now) and to help him set up a chat daemon on his puter (ended up using mine b/c the network wasn't set up to handle his mac yet)... and i called her over the phone to help her figure out where to go to set up and use her email account. and helped her figure out how to use a chat program, too.

well, i'd sit with boy in the computer lab so i could help him learn the ancient cms ibm3270 system (old mainfram... ancient workstations)... i'd read newsgroups and email friends... he'd email her or chat with her (found that my chat program was MUCH better, so the lab fell by the wayside). he'd also email me. that's how i got to know this painfully shy boy. we had some incredible conversations. i became glad that my momma hen instinct had taken him in immediately.

when he and his gf eventually fell apart (and i steadfastly refused to become involved in that affair), he and i sort of became an item, despite my reluctance to even date boys. heck, i still thought he was gay, despite his long-time gf. he's the only person my gaydar has completely failed on.

seven and half years of acquaintance and some of our most memorable conversations are still via icq or email. :)

[sinboy.livejournal.com]

Phones can destroy relationships too.

[semperfiona]

You're right, of course, and so can in-person conversations. I think the article missed the point: what ruins relationships is flying off the handle and not giving the benefit of the doubt. But then, intense communication is hard and scary, and it's far easier to be defensive than vulnerable.

Re:

[sinboy.livejournal.com]

Or to "make one's point" instead of listening and helping someone understand you.