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Two weeks ago when I arrived to pick Rosa up from her dad's house, she had been sleeping in a holey T-shirt that used to be her dad's. I said something about it being time to retire the shirt, and he had her put it in their "poor bag" of used clothing.

I complained that it was worn out and should just be either discarded or cut up for rags. He insisted that the receiving organization would sort everything and it should go anyway. I said they'd probably throw out the whole bag if items in it were that tatty.

It still bugs me. I believe there's no honor in donating trash; it's one thing if I can't use it anymore because of size (it doesn't fit anymore) or taste issues (i.e. I'm tired of the color or something) but it's entirely another to use the donation container as an auxiliary rubbish bin.

[Poll #1238277]

The office is having a bake sale on Valentine's Day, to benefit Mercy Ministries International. It's a group home, "for girls 13-28 who are experiencing life-controlling disorders". (Quoted from the website.)

I am of several minds about this. I'm disturbed because they're clearly and unabashedly a Christian charity--they require church attendance and bible study from their residents and declare that Jesus will save girls from all of their problems--and direct support of religious organizations by a company strikes me as inappropriate. I can downplay this reaction by reminding myself that employee participation is voluntary, if difficult to resist.

But the other things that are troubling me are harder to counter. One of the "life-controlling disorders" they treat is "unwed pregnancy", and there's an adoption agency attached to the home. Pregnant girls are apparently given only two choices: keep the baby or give it up for adoption, and "pregnant girls are given priority because there is such a brief window to make the decision for life" (this is a paraphrase--to the best of my recollection--from an interview with founder Nancy Alcorn in Christianity Today). It leaves me with a flavor of Magdalene Laundry or adoption mill. They do state that girls must make the application themselves and choose for themselves to go there, but it seems to me that it would be easy to coerce a frightened teenager into applying. I can't tell how stringent the checks are that might prevent coercion.

And then there's the concern that same-sex attraction might also be one of the "life-controlling disorders" they treat. This is purely out of my head, and nothing I could find supports it, but on the other hand there's very little to indicate that if, for example, a girl's self-injury is due to inability to reconcile her suppressed lesbian desires with her religion that she'd be encouraged--or even allowed--to come out. I did find one blog that stated that Mercy Ministries has no position one way or the other on homosexuality, but no information directly from the source to corroborate or disprove that.

Also there's the emphasis placed on abstinence from sex (again from the Christianity Today interview). Maybe that makes some sense for teenagers--maybe--but for adult women it's ridiculous. Alcorn talks about having dated a man who lived in another city, and when he came to visit she didn't even let him sleep on her couch, because proximity might be too tempting.

Lastly, and maybe this is stupid, but calling women up to age 28 "girls" is offensive.

On the other hand, chocolate. But seriously. There is probably a need for places like this, and most of my concerns are purely guilt-by-association and what-if. So is it a decent-enough charity to give a couple bucks to for the immediate gratification of a sugar rush, or even the value of a cake or plate of brownies?

I've spent a fair amount of time googling in hopes of finding something concrete, but there's nothing. Does anyone have any other information on this organization, good or bad?

1. Should I bake/buy something to donate to the sale?
2. Should I buy anything from the sale?